In the waiting line

“You’re a yoga instructor? Oh, it’ll be like shelling peas, I tell you. It’ll just pop straight out, no bother,” commented one enthusiastic lady at the yoga studio. “All that deep breathing and open hips stuff…sure you can just meditate right through it. You’ll be grand!” 

Just under two weeks away from my due date, I definitely have this sense that I’m in the waiting line, ready to meet my baby when he/she decides to make an appearance. But I admit I am not always feeling quite so confident. If anything, sometimes I feel just a bit of pressure to have this wonderful birthing experience, just as nature intended. After all, I’ve put in the time on my yoga mat, I’ve read the books (Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth is a must for all pregnant ladies), and watched the DVDs (Orgasmic Birth anyone?). But in reality, there are days when I have serious doubts about how I’m going to get this baby out! And if you’ve seen the size of my belly lately, I think I may be in for a big one.

This is a time when I know I really need to live in the moment, to go with the flow…but with my mind racing between stories of wonderful, natural childbirths to ER style horrors, it can be a challenge! My emotions swing between feeling strong and empowered about all that is to come…to being down right terrified. I blame the pregnancy hormones!

From speaking to people about their pregnancies and their births, one thing is for sure…no two stories are ever the same. What translates as a painful process for one can manifest as a transformative experience for another. What I am working on in this final furlong is surrendering to what will be…

Whatever my experience is, it will be unique to me, no matter how many books I read or DVDs I watch. It’s about trusting in our bodies’ abilities to birth, accepting that they know exactly what to do, even if we don’t know exactly what to expect. While I can’t say I’ll be able to meditate through my whole birth, I know that my yoga practice will be pivotal in helping me to stay focussed. Finally, while it is about having a plan, it’s also being willing to let go of that plan if it’s not working for my baby on that day. Watch this space!

“Giving birth should be your greatest achievement not your greatest fear.” Jane Weideman